While I have tried to start my own traditions in my house of two, they are never met with much enthusiasm and die a slow death alongside the fireplace embers. So every year, I put up the tree by myself,
We join my husband's family on Christmas day and for this I am thankful. I enjoy SO much the laughter of their sibling rivalry displayed through our hours of board games, the older kids now joining us at the 'adult table', and the hugs and filled lap from the kiddos that are still young.
We have a small get-together at my mother's - more of an open house. You never know if either of my step-brothers will join or not. It could be a houseful. More often than not it is just a few. I think this must be heartbreaking for my parents.
So this year, as I ready for 'just another day', I looked out my window in time to see cars pulling into my neighbors house. I have known them well, moreso, in the past than of recent days; a tight knit family who has been very lucky in love and light who seem to pull through anything that gets in their way together. They have been met with some financial troubles to one of their own in just these past weeks.
As I watched this part of the family get out of their vehicle, I noticed a flash of bright pink. Not above being easily distracted by glittery things, I found myself
This baby has come into their life in the past year as an immediate part of the family. Loved and spoiled as if it were their own blood. As I watched, I notice my eyesight get blurry. Something deep down in my heart was speaking and I couldn't stop the tears. I'm not sure what it was trying to say - a mixture of joy for the family, a yearning for that baby to be my own - for a reason to stay up late on Christmas Eve and get up early the next day, and reverence of what she represented...HOPE.
Hope and a REASON to celebrate. Brand new eyes from which to view the world with an innocent little soul. Little hands and little feet to discover a NEW path in life. A helplessness and frailty that asks us to take the journey with her without even saying a word.
As if as a sign from God himself, the gray sky opened up and sun surrounded us all. Silent Night started playing on my stereo behind me as the one and only holiday song that never fails to make me weep (so much so that I typically and immediately change the channel!). I let it sink in. I stood there at my kitchen sink and cryed; tears washing away my darkened heart.
Isn't that what Christmas is all about? Had I forgotted the most important baby of Christmas? Had I failed to remember that it is CHRISTmas?
My mind wandered to another family needing a Christmas miracle...my own. And how ironic and poignant that while my uncle still lie in a hospital, hanging on to every day of sweet life - that he does so to see his unborn grandson. The circle of life will not end with either of them...but go on as an inspiration to both of them. They are forever connected in HOPE.
So as I move forward with this last week of the holiday, I will not forget the HOPE and love and little Chrismas moments of wonder that surrounds each of us now and throughout the year.
Merry Christmas..again..to you all.