22 June 2014

Tiny Dancer

It's the day of my youngest niece's annual dance recital, the one we've been going to every since she was just a toddler. Her mother was a dancer as was her mother before her. My husband...well, he married a woman with two left feet.

Everything about dance seems to come naturally to "Sass". Her many competition ribbons and trophies and certificates and wins prove it. A once-shy girl comes to life on stage. It's where she is meant to be.

Each year as she grows older in age and grows up in disposition, we get a glimpse of the little young lady she is becoming. She may never know the special place she holds in my heart forever.

I've had aunts on both sides of my family in the past, but only one that is still in my life that has known me from birth. Who held me when I was brought home from Hawaii and who loved me from a distance even before that day. Like me to Sass, she married into the family and so was not related by blood but by heart. Like me to Sass, she babysat me and didn't miss a birthday or recital or just a chance to hang out. But kids get bigger, schedules get filled and interests and obligations grow wider. There is a time when you are an aunt in just title. Someone who shows up for birthdays and recitals. Like me to Sass, that first bond is never broken and while she may not know it yet, I would do anything for her and love and protect her like a second mom. I hope I get many opportunities for her to feel just how big she has filled my life - just like I have recently been reminded just how much I am loved by my 'first' aunt.

Back at the recital, the hubs and I arrived late and grabbed a seat on the end of the family aisle. We had great seats this year and I couldn't wait to see our little star shine. At one point in the marathon of tapping shoes and pointed toes, Sass' Memo stumbled through our narrow aisle to use the restroom. Upon returning, she stopped right in front of me and leaned down to tell me that she had a dream about me last night. One in which I was holding a baby girl.

I was speechless.

This was not someone who knew of our endeavors. She had no knowledge that on this very day, I had completed my second round of IUI. She had no idea that miracles could very well be happening inside my hormone-packed body at that very moment.

Before she moved away back through the tangle of legs to her seat, I pulled her down to me and gave her a tight hug and simply said, "Thank you." She replied, "I've had premonitions like this before and they usually come true. So you just never know!"

A baby girl. Like all those beautiful little girls up on stage. Like OUR amazing little girl on stage up next. I could barely control my tears of mixed emotion as she walked out and absolutely lit up that stage.

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